They pulled and they strained, those twelve little lasses
The drunken old driver stood holding his dick
I knew by the "red nose" that this was Old Nick
Slower then snails his chargers they came
And he whipped and he flailed as he called them by name
"Come on Toni and Tina and Tammy
Pull the sleigh or I'll paddle your fanny
And Judy and Julie and Gina and Jilly
With blazing red asses you look somewhat silly
Steffie and Kathie and Kimmie and Kay
You bend yourselves over..its floggins today"
Up on the roof, he went, stumbled and fell
And down the chimney he came screaming like hell
He staggered and stumbled and let out roar
Tripped over a flogger we'd left on the floor!
He set out stuffing stockings we'd hung with great care
A flogger, a shocker, and jeweled clips, (nice pair!)
He worked with a frenzy, then he saw me, OH GREAT!
But I had nothing to fear, 'cause he asked for a date!
Back to his work he flew with a wink of his eye,
As he said "to hell with the cookies, got any pie?
And could I bother you for coffee, it's cold out ya know?"
I said, "Why not, that storm's quite a blow."
He ate and he drank then he finished his work
I wondered if he'd noticed my strange little quirk
He chuckled and said "This should help with your kink"
He stuffed in MY stocking a paddle covered in mink
As he went for the door he said, "Learn to spread JOY

It's more important than any ol' toy!"
I heard him exclaim as he was pulled out of sight

"MERRY CHRISTMAS YOU KINKSTERS
... AND TO ALL A GOOD NIGHT"